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Proverbs 11:29

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I’m thinking that we should all remember the wisdom of Solomon in the Book of Proverbs: 

  He that troubles his own house shall inherit the wind: 
     and the fool shall be servant to the wise of heart.

The phrase “own house” could easily be substituted with any (social?) group an individual belongs to: your friends, your family, a sports team, your colleagues at work, your country and so on. The tragedy is that it’s difficult to see when we are falling foul of this, because it really doesn’t take much. It seems to me that when one believes one is right it’s easy to become rigidly inflexible, it’s easy to lack consideration for the feelings of others, or indeed to dismiss them out of hand out of sheer frustration with the other rather than taking a step back and questioning one’s own standpoint. Worse is that it’s easy to overlook the immediate damage this can cause to relationships, to how people perceive you, and of-course their willingness to want to engage with you. It seems to me this should be interpreted as a serious lapse in judgment in any of us, and near fatal lapse in judgment for anyone in a position of authority/leadership; it tends to undermine trust by creating distance; it’s becomes a barrier to any constructive dialogue; and those around you can lose their voice. When that happens you have, quite literally, inherited the wind.

Part of the problem is that we are deeply emotional creatures, and we wear those emotions like a cloak around us. Something I’ve observed often is that even when an individual is putting forth an argument in a manner that he/she might feel is objective, concise, erudite and wholly reasonable, their body language, or language, or tone, or even a slight unconscious inflection when uttering a single word, can send out a completely different message. It’s this dichotomy that we create that puts us at odds with those observing us, those that we are trying to communicate with.

It’s actually quite amusing to observe when this happens during the current political debates taking place between the candidates in the American Presedential election. That’s not really not what I want to talk about though.

So I guess the question becomes, how do we guard against this? How do I know when I’m doing this? It shouldn’t be a paradox because in as much as we are emotional creatures we are also hugely perceptive creatures. Yet it becomes a paradox when you ask what is it about our emotions that seemingly overrides our ability to perceive the effect our words and actions have on others? or worse, what is it that overrides the need to perceive the effect we have on others – until the damage is already done?

Is it something that we can guard against by simply thinking or taking a moment to pause before speaking/reacting? Is this a quality that can be taught? or is this simply something we have to learn in the crucible of our own minds as we reflect on each time we make this mistake? or should we simply temper what we do with the knowledge that we are part of a (social) group and that our behaviour will reflect how much we are accepted and valued, or indeed, rejected by that group?

As an observation this is something I’ve learned the hard way, for me it was brought into sharp relief when my father died. Fortunately, as social groups go, families are rather more forgiving than others 🙂 

"The universe speaks in many languages, but only one voice ... 
It speaks in the language of hope."

"It speaks in the language of trust. It speaks in the language of 
strength and the language of compassion. It is the language of the 
heart and the language of the soul. But always it is the same voice.
It is the voice of our ancestors speaking through us and the voice 
of our inheritors waiting to be born. The small, still voice that says: 
'We are one. No matter the blood, no matter the skin, no matter the 
world, no matter the star. .. We are one. No matter the pain, no 
matter the darkness, no matter the loss, no matter the fear. .. We 
are one.' Here, gathered together in common cause, we begin to 
realize this singular truth and this singular rule that we must be 
kind to one another. Because each voice enriches us and ennobles 
us and each voice lost diminishes us. We are the voice of the 
universe, the soul of creation, the fire that will light our way to 
a better future. We are one."
   
           G'Kar in "The Paragon of Animals"

Paradox of Life

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        Paradox of Life
     by Sunday B. Fakus

True love, like tree branches,
Brings fruits in its due season.
Lofty trees of barren leaves
Is love that has nothing to give.

Secret love, like hidden treasures,
Has worth- when it's ripe.
A thousand words of empty promises
Is hope that has nothing to yield.

Shattered dream, like broken hearts,
Takes away the joy of life.
Every love that a liar gives
Is nothing but a gate of grief.

A restless heart, like raging winds,
Rubs the mind of all its peace.
Silent pain of a lonely soul
Is worse than worries of hopeful lovers.

SVN: Useful bash commands

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Here’s a couple of useful bash commands I’ve been using recently when working with Subversion:

The first helps me with an annoyance I have with externals. Normally doing a “svn st –ignore-externals” still lists all the externals even though I’m not actually interesting in seeing them when I want to know what I’ve changed locally. For example in the output below I only really want to know that I’ve changed ‘development-tenants.xml’, i’m not really interested in the rest. 

Nadeems-Computer:zephyr-trunk nadeemshabir$ svn st --ignore externals
X      lib/arc
X      lib/moriarty
X      lib/simpleSAMLphp
X      3rdPartyDevelopmentTools/svnant-1.0.0
X      3rdPartyDevelopmentTools/PHPUnit
X      3rdPartyDevelopmentTools/selenium-server-1.0-beta-1
X      3rdPartyDevelopmentTools/selenium-core-0.8.3
M      developmentdata/development-tenants.xml

To address this the first command is an alias I’ve created that shows me all the files that I’ve changed/added/removed locally but specifically doesn’t list anything related to any externals

alias whatschanged='svn st --ignore-externals | grep -v "^X "'

The second bash command deals with the fact that I often have a large number of files I want to add to subversion all at once. This command takes all un-added files and adds them to subversion … 

svn st | grep '^? ' | awk '{ print $2 }' | xargs svn add

Hope you find them useful.

Mongol: The Rise To Power Of Genghis Khan

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Finally got round to watching Sergei Bodrov’s visually stunning Mongol – The Rise To Power Of Genghis Khan. The movie is a sweeping epic that is rumored to be the first part of a trilogy that Bodrov is making about the Mongol ruler. In this film though Bodrov focuses on the life of the young Temudgin and his ascent to power.

When his father is poisoned and his lands and posessions taken, Temudgin flees from his father’s rivals. He is saved by a young prince, Jamukha, and the two become blood brothers. Later that bond of friendship is tested, though, when the grown Temudgin wages a war, in violation of the Mongol code, to win back the captive wife Borte. As Temudgin asserts his own power, he must also face Jamukha in all-out battle if he is to secure the safety of his family. The movie offers a unique look at the influence of love and loyalty to the life and times of one of history’s most renowned rulers.

This film isn’t historically accurate and is very much a revisionist account of the early life of the enigmatic Genghis Khan. This fact didn’t make the movie any less captivating, or enjoyable. It is a gorgeously shot epic, with beautifully composed landscape shots punctuated by thundering hooves and bloody, slow-motion battle sequences.

Definitly worth watching!

Not so random thoughts …

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G'Quan wrote: 'There is a greater darkness than the one we fight. 
It is the darkness of the soul that has lost its way. The war we fight 
is not against powers and principalities, it is against chaos and despair. 
Greater than the death of flesh is the death of hope, the death of 
dreams. Against this peril we can never surrender. The future is all 
around us, waiting in moments of transition, to be born in moments 
of revelation. No one knows the shape of that future, or where it will 
take us. We know only that it is always born in pain.'
   -- G'Kar in Babylon 5:"Z'ha'dum"

"Then I will tell you a great secret, Captain. Perhaps the 
greatest of all time. The molecules of your body are the 
same molecules that make up this station and the nebula 
outside, that burn inside the stars themselves. We are 
starstuff, we are the universe made manifest, trying to 
figure itself out. As we have both learned, sometimes the 
universe requires a change of perspective." 
   -- Delenn to Sheridan in Babylon 5:"A Distant Star"

"We create the meaning in our lives. It does not exist 
independently. Being Anla-shok does not mean worrying 
about what others will think about us. It does not mean 
deciding what to do based upon whether or not it serves our 
sense of ego or destiny. It means living each moment as if 
it were your last one. It means doing each right thing 
because it is the right thing. The scale doesn't matter. The 
where, the when, the how, or in what cause .. none of those 
things matter. In my life, I've discovered very few truths. 
Here is the greatest truth I know: Your death, Rastenn, will 
have a meaning if it comes while you're in fullest pursuit of 
your heart."

	-- Sech Turval to Rastenn in Babylon 5:"Learning Curve"

… and finally for now … 

"What does the candle represent?"
"Life."
"Whose life?"
"All life, every life. We're all born as molecules in the hearts of a 
billion stars, molecules that do not understand politics, policies and 
differences. In a billion years we, foolish molecules forget who we 
are and where we came from. Desperate acts of ego. We give 
ourselves names, fight over lines on maps. And pretend our light is 
better than everyone else's. The flame reminds us of the piece of 
those stars that live inside us. A spark that tells us: you should know 
better. The flame also reminds us that life is precious, as each flame 
is unique. When it goes out, it's gone forever. And there will never be 
another quite like it. So many candles will go out tonight. I wonder 
some days if we can see anything at all."

    -- Sheridan and Delenn in Babylon 5:"And All My Dreams, Torn Asunder"

Zen Master Raven

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Having spent the previous evening working till way past midnight, I decided to keep my laptop switched off yesterday – It was Saturday after all! Besides I’d come to a realisation earlier in the week. That although I really love what I do at Talis, I’ve been using my work, rightly or wrongly, as a way to hide from other things that I haven’t figured out how to deal with. 

Death

    Mole came to Raven privately and said, "We haven't talked 
about death very much. I'm not concerned about where I will 
go, but watching so many family members die, I'm wondering 
what happens at the point of death?".
   Raven sat silently for a while, then said, "I give away my 
belongings".

After visiting dad’s grave yesterday morning, I decided to take a trip into the city center and do a little shopping – wasn’t really sure what I was shopping for. I’ve been having strange moments like that a lot recently – strange in the sense that I’m doing things that feel random, they don’t necessarily have any purpose at the outset. Anyway after buying a couple of DVD’s and some clothes, I ended up at Borders Book Shop in the Bull Ring.

I wasn’t looking for anything in particular, I simply walked from one aisle of books to another glancing at the shelves to see if anything caught my eye. I love Science Fiction and Fantasy novels so I did consciously walk over to that area and spent a while there but didn’t find anything that really stood out. I also spent a fair bit of time rifling through a bunch of Manga novels but I aready own all the good stuff and some of the newer series have proven to be disappointing. Eventually I ended up in the section entitled Philosophy / Spirituality – that’s when I found “Zen Master Raven: Sayings and Doings of a Wise Bird“. When I got back home I proceeded to spend the rest of the afternoon and much of the evening reading it from cover to cover, twice! Here’s why …

I had this terrible feeling that whilst I understood much of it … there’s a huge amount of meaning within it’s covers that I simply can’t figure out … yet … It feels like a thorn in my mind … and I love it …

The Spirit of the Practice

    Relaxing with the others after zazen one evening, Owl
asked "What is the Spirit of the practice?"
    Raven said, "Inquiry."
    Owl cocked his head and asked, "What do I inquire 
about?"
    Raven said, "Good start."

I think it’s a wonderfully delightful book. The author Robert Aitken, is a well known American Zen Master, whilst he has written a number of other books and essays this piece is very different. His literary device of using animals, unconventional in Zen, is remarkably successful in presenting the promises and risks, hopes and fears of the Tallspruce community that Raven Roshi shares with his students, neighbours and friends. I think this book captures the spirit of Zen as much as any book can, and it demonstrates how Zen can become the practice of a lifetime. 

Character

    One evening, in a discussion of his personal problems,
Raven asked Brown Bear, "What is the role of character in 
the practise?"
    Brown Bear said, "I try to keep my promises."
    Raven said, "I try to keep my promises, too, but I'm easily
distracted."
    Brown Bear said, "The cold wind reminds me."

Aitken’s book is the distillation of a collection of stories, some only a few sentences in length, that, as he sees it, illuminate the Way. These stories are succinct, charming and contain a huge depth of insight. The stories might feel weird, but are hugely compelling. 

Very Special

    In a group munching grubs one afternoon, Mole
remarked, "The Buddha Shakyamuni was very special
wasn't he! I'm sure there has never been anyone like 
him".
    Raven said, "Like the madrone."
    Mole asked, "How is the madrone unique?"
    Raven said, "Every madrone leaf."
    Mole fell silent.
    Procupine asked, "How does the uniqueness of every
Madrone leaf relate to the practice?"
    Raven said, "Your practice."

The Web as a city

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Outside.in’s Steven Johnson says the Web is like a city: built by many people, completely controlled by no one, intricately interconnected and yet functioning as many independent parts. While disaster strikes in one place, elsewhere, life goes on. This is a pretty old ted talk from back in 2003, it’s only been released this month. Much of what Steven talks about would feel far more important and powerful if you were listening to this talk five years ago Web culture in particular has advanced far beyond this already. So although dated its still a wonderfully inspiring talk.

Be Your Own Therapist

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ABSTRACT

We spend our lives being seduced by the outside world, believing without question that happiness and suffering come from “out there.” In reality, Buddhist teachings explain that they come from the way we perceive and interpret things, not the things themselves.

This deeply held misconception is at the root of our dissatisfaction, self-doubt, anger, depression, anxiety, and the rest. But our minds can change. By becoming deeply familiar with the workings of our own cognitive processes through introspection and learning to deconstruct them – truly, being our own therapists – we can loosen the grip of these neuroses and grow our marvelous potential for contentment, clarity, and courage, which are at the core of our being.

… very very deep!

Do what you love …

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Rob wrote a wonderful piece earlier this week on Passion, personal brand and doing what you love. We’ve both spent time reflecting, individually, on how our paths led us to Talis and the work we are now doing. We’ve also discussed this subject on a number of occasions and I think we’ve both reached the same conclusion – life is too short to waste it away doing something you dont love. It takes time to come to a realisation like this, and sadly, it often require some external event to force you to stop and reflect on your life, how you got to where you are and most importantly where is it your heading. I know some people describe this as a kind of awakening, and I guess if you honestly believe that life is a journey then it’s moments such as these that can feel like a fork in the road…

One path leads back to the world that you know, its the world that you’ve become used to, it’s the world in which you don’t have to love what you do to get by, it feels comfortable because there is no risk, you don’t have to deal with the unknown too often, you don’t have to rock the boat. In many ways you’ve already reached a destination … or is it more true to say that you’ve reached an empasse?

The other path leads to somewhere else, unfortunately you don’t know what’s down there. You don’t necessarily even know where you’re going. Here’s the thing though … maybe you don’t have to care about the destination, maybe it’s less about the where, and much more about the how?

I guess that’s how I see things these days. There’s a part of me that believes that if do what I love, then it won’t feel like my life is just slipping away, one monotonous day to the next. I lived my life like that once, it’s so easy to do, you become so used to it that you don’t even realise that something is wrong … I actually had to come to within a heartbeat of losing my life before I realised that life is far to precious a gift to waste like that. To spend so much of it doing something that I felt completely indifferent towards, even hated at times … Isn’t it fascinating how the the worst prisons are the ones we create for ourselves?

There’s two quotes I want to end with, the first is from Paul Graham’s essay entitled How to do what you love, I remember reading it a couple of years ago, and although I don’t agree with some of it, it’s still a wonderful piece. His essay ends with this obeservation:

Finding work you love is very difficult. Most people fail. Even if you succeed, it’s rare to be free to work on what you want till your thirties or forties. But if you have the destination in sight you’ll be more likely to arrive at it. If you know you can love work, you’re in the home stretch, and if you know what work you love, you’re practically there.

The second quote is much shorter, but far more profound, you see for me loving what I do is a part of a much greater truth, one that underpins everything I’ve said, and I think almost everything I now hold dear:

There is life in every breath